One common behavior we picked up from our traditional parenting style is to shout/scold our child when he messes up or when he injures himself due to negligence. The scolding/shouting is a result of the depth of concern we have for him. Yet our child does not feel our concern when we shout/scold him, which follows the incident. By doing that consistently and regularly, we make him feel disapproved, rejected and condemned. This misrepresents who God is, as he eventually thinks that God is angry/upset whenever we mess up or hurt ourselves by negligence. Nothing is further from the truth.
This traditional Asian parenting has to be replaced and re-presented so that we can represent the Father to our child. When he messes up or injures himself due to negligence, the quickest response we need to have is to reveal our concern directly by the expression of love. A hug or gentle word of encouragement conveys a very powerful message - "I am with you. I love you regardless of what you just did. You are my precious child." Doing that consistently and regularly will reinforce and strengthen our child's identity.
If we don't consider how our Father in heaven would respond to us and deliberately follow His example, it is completely natural for us to parent our child according to the traditional way our parents brought us up.
I'm far from perfect. But each time when I look to the Father, I know I have to 'kill' the traditional parenting ways.
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